The friendship connection.

Few are the thoughts more comforting than the sure knowledge that, somewhere, a dear friend is sitting on the toilet at the same time you are.

Universe, you've done it again.

I was fighting an uphill battle today to stay focused on my work, and right when I was getting into an afternoon groove, the power in the office cut out and my computer shut down. So I'm going to go ahead and call that a sign, and close up shop for the day.

Actually, I do have a few things I still need to finish before I leave. It's a better story if I just drop the mic and go home, though.

Excuse me.

If you ever come across a woman who appears to be unconscious, and you want to be absolutely sure that she's not faking it before you take action, just shout to anyone nearby, "Quick, call an ambulance! I think this woman is pregnant!" If the prone woman suddenly, indignantly blurts out, "Excuse me?", then you'll know it's not quite as bad as it looks.

If she really is obviously pregnant, just shout something like, "Ma'am, are you all right?" Chances are she's not, because in my experience, pregnant women don't goof around too much.